What not to do
Strap bombs to yourself and blow up the unexpectant citizenry; raze an endangered rainforest to the ground; sink an oil tanker in the middle of the Pacific; slaughter brunette women on a manic axe-wielding killing spree; molest young children; drown kittens with bricks; eat snails and call it a delicacy. Commit all these travesties, but don't you ever, ever take for granted the unbearable ecstasy derived from burying your arms and face into a loaded dryer, all fresh and warm like honey, and inhaling.
And don't ever pass up an opportunity to inscribe transient words into the wide white sheets of brief blizzards.
