Disgruntled rant

Usually I'm fairly contented with my gender, apart from the (quasi-)monthly bouts of madness and the fact that my part in continuing the species will involve ramming a very large watermelonesque object out of my very small uterus. Today I've discovered a new dimension to the horror, namely:

Bad men will shout mean things at you.

I'll hastily anticipate the backlash here, and say that I wasn't driving, but we were tail-ended badly today by two specimens of that repugnant breed known as Obnoxious Male Malaysian Drivers who, in true Malaysian form, were trying to run a red light from behind us. Our car is totalled, and due to a manufacturing failure, all airbags failed to open. Everyone involved was injured to varying degrees of paralysis, including probable brain damage to at least two of us. In fact, I'm typing this entry with my teeth because I no longer possess any motor control below my neck, and my only two consolations are a) in all probability I already had brain damage in the first place, and b) when my period does come, I probably won't feel it. Hurrah!

Only joking. The bad men shouted at us for half an hour, and refused either to show us licences or insurance, or to leave us a name and contact details. They insisted that we settle this at the nearest police station, but naturally, failed to turn up. Conclusion: men are asshats, and I do not like being female because they were SO TOTALLY PUSHING US AROUND and shouting mean things at us, and I've never felt so much like a USELESS WOMAN before.

I'm not the kind to get intimidated easily, but they were shouting at us in Malay, and having not spoken Malay for far too long, I suffer certain inadequacies in fluency. And the last thing I wanted was to stammer in front of these assholes.

Also, they were big and mean. Really.

So, this is a plea to everyone in Malaysia: if you see a Mitsubishi Storm jeep-type vehicle with a fractured front bumper, licence plate WKW 1242, please slather the windows in eggshells and hold large destructive parties on the roof of the car, preferably involving vast amounts of embittered pregnant women wearing stilettoes.

I wish those bastards all the pain in the world. May they someday have to give birth.

[Edit] A vagrant thought yielded by above rant: do women in comas have periods???